Majikal Realities

A lot of us people who have experienced a majikal state of reality don’t know what to call the specific types of experiences, so we turn to so-called gurus (cult leaders and con artists) to define them for us, and as a result, get lost in a lot of bullshit.

These are the things that I believe in:

The Between. I didn’t make up this concept, the Tibetan Book of Living and Dying did. It basically describes what people call the angelic and demonic realms, and the sorts of beings that you’ll meet on your journey there. I’ve taken a few trips to the Between and practiced majik there. It’s kind of a scary place though, so you might want to think about it first before you jump into that particular version of reality, since it is essentially the land of the dead. If you want to know what it is, pick up a copy of the book. This is a good one to start with:

Kundalini Energy and the Chakra System.  I’ve had my chakras activated and my kundalini has flown through my body. You have to experience it for yourself in order to understand what it feels like. I have a feeling that most people who say that they’ve felt kundalini energy haven’t and are just making that shit up, because it too, is pretty fucking scary.

Spirits. I believe in spirits of nature, spirits of animals, spirits of ancestors, spirits of people because I have had personal experience with them, and they have actually moved physical objects in front of my very own eyes and they’ve done this since I’ve been medicated. I just say “Hello” to them. If they’re assholes I banish them, if they’re nice, I let them stick around. Sometimes a spirit rushes up on me, and it feels like major energy waves just hitting me. This is usually a warning that some shit is about to go down and to get the fuck out of wherever I am.


That’s all I can think of for now. All of my spiritual work is done for free, and I tend to not work on people, but rather, on the world itself.


I have done some crazy shit, but I’ve never been crazy enough to expect other people to believe in my bullshit.


Looking back through my blog, it appears that I have a bit of a persecution complex. Now I actually HAVE been persecuted, but I’ve never been an orphan in a third world country who has to drink muddy water full of parasites, so there’s that.


Okay, I am going to give up my persecution complex. When you’re a majikal thinker like me, it’s not a good trait to go on and on about how God and Satan are persecuting you because it makes you look like a fucking idiot.


Yes I believe that the spirit Aleister Crowley carried me for a while when I was going through my majikal initiation, but I never spoke in a British accent, so it could have been anybody really. Actually, it was probably just a splintered off part of my own personality, but whatever. I do have separate personalities, most of them based on real-life people. I’m a natural born roleplayer.



So okay, no more persecution complex. I will, however, continue to mock Satan, because it’s really fun.

Satan Digs Homeopathy.

It’s true. He’s a total Looney Tunes New Age Freakshow. He also likes fat middle-aged pussy. A LOT! Now that I’m officially middle-aged, I fear running into him. Doing my best to shed those pounds.


(Actually, I don’t fear him at all. He’s really stupid. I mean he’s smart, but as far as interpersonal relationships go, he’s a big idiot.)


Thank you for choosing Lisa! Saved me from a whole lot of bullshit that I was about to wade through with you. I will be eternally grateful to that skank for “stealing” you from me.


Jesus, I could have been stuck with that motherfucker if it wasn’t for her. He let me sleep on the floor while he slept on the couch. I mean that shithead actually tried to convince me that the only spiders that bite are black widows, and that you pronounce the “l” in salmon. Lord knows what other things he was going to “teach” me.


He actually said to me one day “Katherine, I’m a gentleman.” Pfft. He was probably the most ungentlemanly man I had ever met in my life.. let me sleep on the floor like his fucking pet dog. God he was an asshole! Don’t even get me started on the MIND GAMES! Geez louise, I have never met a more manipulative person in my life, and I grew up with a borderline personality sister and a brother with a Jesus complex.




Oh yeah, and I had this experience:


Just not with your stupid self-centered ass! You’ll never be as good as he was. Fuck “In Your Eyes.” Ho hum. Next!


Now I just need to figure out why Crowley had me save my virginity for you. I mean, just because you’re The Dark Lord himself, doesn’t really make you all that more special than anyone else. In fact, I found out that you’re actually a sub par individual. Sure you have lots of fancy tricks up your sleeve, but you’re still the biggest jerk I’ve ever been with, and I went through a date rape!.


At least Crowley kept me from turning into an anorexic, because that certainly was one of the plans for me. When I actually WAS actively dieting, I displayed serious anorexic tendencies such as measuring my salad dressing precisely and chewing fatty foods for the flavor and spitting them out in the trash. I did get really skinny, though.


And yes, I openly mock Satan because unlike Satanists and Fundamentalist Christians, I actually fucked the guy and lived to tell the tale. He is everything you expect, and nothing you expect all wrapped up into one pile of horseshit, and I actually let that thing stick its dick in me. I was really horny, and he is pretty sexy in a hairy creepy sort of way. I have no regrets however, because had I not slept with him, I never would have quit smoking, and that’s a fact. He implanted the idea that I could do it into my subconscious, and for that I will be eternally grateful.


And I will admit, I was not the easiest person to get through to back then. I was a real bitch on wheels, in fact. But still, he could have been a little nicer to me, a little more understanding.


And yes, my dear readers, I KNOW that I am fucking bonkers.


My days of being a goddess are over. I’m just a normal human now. I make wishes that come true all the time, but anybody can do this. I just can’t seem to win the lottery though. You would think, with all this power that I’ve been wielding, I would have figured out money by now. I guess I’ll just have to study at school for a career like everybody else.


I’ll still read books on magick, however, because you never know, there might be something about conjuring up some money in them somewhere. I need partials and those aren’t cheap.



Oh and here’s my Amazon Wish List:


Send me things. You will obey. Thanks.

Purple Reign

Okay, so the conspiracy world has linked up Prince’s death with the Queen of England’s 90th birthday. Knowing what I know about magick, I can see how the stars might have aligned for that, so this is what I figure. If the queen had her black magickians kill Prince in that elevator so she could go on living another ten years, or whatever the case may be, Prince can totally come back and haunt that bitch. Hell, he could give her an aneurysm if he wanted to, it’s his total right. And I wouldn’t put it past the arrogant motherfucker to pull some kind of shit like that.


So Imma be watchin’ ole Lizzy for the next few months, just to see what’s up with her. Meanwhile, I will be keeping my nails a lovely shade of Royal Purple until the bottle runs out.


Honestly, I think this phenomenon called “Gangstalking” is actually the beginning of The Rapture.

These people believe that the government has targeted them for harrasment. They believe that they run into episodes of “street theatre” that is about their lives. They believe that they are being electronically harassed. They believe that their family and friends are “in on it.” They believe that there are smear campaigns against them.


I believe that these people are actually having shamanic experiences with their worlds. That synchronicity is flowing freely in their lives, and that they  must learn to control which forces come in and out of their lives.

If you focus on dark forces, then you will be cloaked in a dark world. If this happens to you, you must declutter your life. Get rid of any addictions, get rid of old magazines, old clothes you don’t wear anymore, food items that you’re never going to eat… basically anything with stagnant energy on it. Give your house a thorough cleaning with the intention of sweeping out the darkness and bringing in the light.

Then you want to make room for light forces in your life. Buy an abundance candle and light it for an hour every day. Pray to the archangels for guidance and protection. Practice peaceful meditation. If you have a garden or a balcony, buy some beautiful wind chimes. Listen to classical music, particularly Mozart. Look up some positive affirmations for you to say every day. Take care of your physical health. Most importantly, be very generous with Love. But love the right way. Obsessive love isn’t really love. Learn to give up the negative and allow the positive in your life, and you will see brighter synchronicity flow into your life.


Always remember, privacy is an illusion. There really is no such thing. Adam and Eve discovered this when they ate from the Tree of Knowledge.



Actual individuals who have been targeted by the government usually wind up dead. Just sayin’.


I am going through an alchemical process right now. My body is changing and my very way of thinking is changing along with it.


I want Satan to get the fuck off of my planet and go straight back to Hell where he belongs. Ultimately, his seduction hasn’t worked, and he can kiss my motherfucking ass.




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